No matter how old we get, it still brings us pain when our kids are hurt. We go so far as to ask God to give us the hurt instead. I went to the hospital yesterday afternoon to see the daughter, recovering from back surgery. I hate having to think about all the pain she has endured in the past few years, and I would gladly take all of it to spare her. Maybe she will come home today, with about 6 weeks of recovery, for the pain to go away and for renewal of her strength. The doctor thinks the little steel disc is sitting exactly right, and he is hopeful that completely recovery of the spinal column is possible. As I looked at the x-ray the doctor brought in and listened to him talk to the daughter, I felt joy. Joy that my child would be okay.
It makes me conscious of all the kids in the world who are not okay today. The kids sleeping on the streets right now in Eastleigh, Nairobi, since it is nighttime there. The kids in Iraq on any street, the kids near that marketplace in Mogadishu, the kids in any school where bullying and fear reign - let's together ask God for his powerful beam of light to rest on those kids for their good.
There is a God in heaven, there is a God who owns the earth and all in it, there is a God who secures the future. So joy will not die, will not be defeated, will not dim in the presence of pain. Count on it!
charles
Friday, December 14, 2007
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Back in the USA
Darlene and I go back and forth from Kenya to USA. The contrasts are great, the details astounding, and the joy remains constant. We leave the street kids in good hands -- the Kenyan Team is astounding. The kids at Kamulu had a "Family Day" today, with any family members they have visiting for the day. It's a great time and very meaningful to the kids. Even though their family experience may have been terrible, family is still very important to them.
Now we are in California. I am at gymnastics with Morgan, the youngest granddaughter. Wow, this is fun! Watching her fulfills a little part of my heart that is special. Our daughter is in the hospital after back surgery. Darlene has gone to see her today after taking the twins to school. Her husband is getting much-needed sleep. So we are useful even here!
Being USEFUL is just what we want. It's a big part of what brings meaning to our lives. We want our usefulness to bring joy to people and also hold meaning for something eternal as well.
Have to go now -- the granddaughter is ready to move on -- happy holidays -- charles
Now we are in California. I am at gymnastics with Morgan, the youngest granddaughter. Wow, this is fun! Watching her fulfills a little part of my heart that is special. Our daughter is in the hospital after back surgery. Darlene has gone to see her today after taking the twins to school. Her husband is getting much-needed sleep. So we are useful even here!
Being USEFUL is just what we want. It's a big part of what brings meaning to our lives. We want our usefulness to bring joy to people and also hold meaning for something eternal as well.
Have to go now -- the granddaughter is ready to move on -- happy holidays -- charles
Monday, December 3, 2007
BurnOut
Dealing with Burnout
Now and then people are concerned about Darlene and me – about my health, about all the travel we do, and especially about the possibility of burnout. We see and know about a lot of terrible things that happen to children on the streets. Sometimes a young person with whom we have worked disappoints, does something wrong, and leaves the ministry. Sometimes kids we love return to the streets, choosing sniffing glue in the alleyways over a safe and warm life at Made in the Streets. Maybe a student stays with us all the way to 18 years old, gets an ID card, but doesn’t care to look for a job, and ends up on the same streets where they were when we met him.
So far we continue with desire to see this ministry through, to get all the Team fully trained and dedicated to long-term ministry, to get all the infrastructure, policy and program needed to ensure an ongoing effort to help kids get off the streets and into a productive and spiritual life.
But we are alert to the possibility that our Kenyan team members could burn out also. We have recently had a series of events on the streets that could burn out a person out. I thought you might be interested in how we deal with possible burnout.
Two weeks ago the 6-year-old daughter of one of the young women who come to our Monday program for street mothers (ages range from 18 to 34) was raped by someone known to the mother. It was a traumatic event, and our Team in Eastleigh (Ann, Anthony and Kennedy) dealt with the aftermath – getting the man in jail, talking with the mother and child. Then Nicholas, who dropped out of our program in Eastleigh in 2000, killed Patrick, who had been in our program with Kennedy and Anthony in 2003, over a card game. The next day, after the police had come around but did not act, the other guys at the base killed Nicholas. Again it was Kennedy and Anthony who met with the others at the base, with Patrick’s brother, and who took responsibility for the evening meetings where they raise money for Patrick’s burial in Western Kenya. So our Team has been up all night at the fund-raisers and working during the daytime. Then a woman named Njeri (age 34) who lives at Jamaica Base was beaten up by a former boyfriend from another base. The mother of one of our girls, Mary Muthoni, who alse lives at the base, came to ask our Team to help with first aid. When Anthony arrived there, he found Njeri in bad condition, so he got her to the hospital, after getting the young man into jail. When Anthony saw all the blood on her and was told by the doctor that she had internal bleeding, needed surgery, and might not survive, he felt a spasm in his body. He has some chest problems which may be asthma also, and the spasms made that worse.
When Anthony came to Sunday morning Bible class that I am teaching on 2 Peter this term (the Eastleigh Team comes to Kamulu for Saturday night and Sunday morning), I saw him spasm in class. It appeared to me that he has 3 spasms – his left arm, the left side of his body and his whole upper body. It is just a momentary jerk. He also feels great responsibility; a local policeman told him he was responsible if anything bad happened at the nighttime fund-raisers. At any rate, we decided it was time to take “burnout action.”
My first action was to talk briefly with Anthony. I asked him to describe what he was feeling in his body. Then I instructed him to take care of himself as well as all the other people. When he told me that they were raising about 500 shillings each night in the fund-raisers, I told him to ask them NOT to meet Sunday night, and in turn I would give them 1,000 shillings. That allows Anthony to get a full night’s sleep. Then Francis Mbuvi instructed Anthony to come back to Kamulu on Monday and spend two nights with us, giving Mbuvi time to debrief Anthony and listen to him talk about his feelings and the bad stuff he has seen lately. Kennedy will handle the fund-raisers Monday and Tuesday. Then Kennedy will come out for two nights and spend time with Mbuvi. I also asked Anthony about the t-shirt that he was wearing under his outer shirt; I told him I could tell that it has a big red “S” on it. He looked at me quizzically until I told him about Superman, then he laughed and admitted her felt responsible for everything.
Our next step was to give him opportunity to do something truly good. On Monday he plans to get Njeri from the hospital, take her to the police station to write a statement, then see her back to Jamaica Base. So I gave him 1,000 shillings and asked him to find her a room down in Mathare Valley that he can rent for about 700 shillings a month, then to buy her and her two children food with the rest. He will pay two months’ rent and encourage her and her 16-year-old to earn money in the next two months and be able to pay the rent after that. Whether that happens or she returns to Jamaica Base, we will have done something good for Anthony. Tomorrow when we go to Eastleigh for the Monday program, we will take two mattresses and two blankets for the family’s bedding.
I also alerted Larry Conway to the situation so that he can find some quiet time soon to sit with Anthony and be a listener.
I’ll let you know later what happens to the spasms.
Now and then people are concerned about Darlene and me – about my health, about all the travel we do, and especially about the possibility of burnout. We see and know about a lot of terrible things that happen to children on the streets. Sometimes a young person with whom we have worked disappoints, does something wrong, and leaves the ministry. Sometimes kids we love return to the streets, choosing sniffing glue in the alleyways over a safe and warm life at Made in the Streets. Maybe a student stays with us all the way to 18 years old, gets an ID card, but doesn’t care to look for a job, and ends up on the same streets where they were when we met him.
So far we continue with desire to see this ministry through, to get all the Team fully trained and dedicated to long-term ministry, to get all the infrastructure, policy and program needed to ensure an ongoing effort to help kids get off the streets and into a productive and spiritual life.
But we are alert to the possibility that our Kenyan team members could burn out also. We have recently had a series of events on the streets that could burn out a person out. I thought you might be interested in how we deal with possible burnout.
Two weeks ago the 6-year-old daughter of one of the young women who come to our Monday program for street mothers (ages range from 18 to 34) was raped by someone known to the mother. It was a traumatic event, and our Team in Eastleigh (Ann, Anthony and Kennedy) dealt with the aftermath – getting the man in jail, talking with the mother and child. Then Nicholas, who dropped out of our program in Eastleigh in 2000, killed Patrick, who had been in our program with Kennedy and Anthony in 2003, over a card game. The next day, after the police had come around but did not act, the other guys at the base killed Nicholas. Again it was Kennedy and Anthony who met with the others at the base, with Patrick’s brother, and who took responsibility for the evening meetings where they raise money for Patrick’s burial in Western Kenya. So our Team has been up all night at the fund-raisers and working during the daytime. Then a woman named Njeri (age 34) who lives at Jamaica Base was beaten up by a former boyfriend from another base. The mother of one of our girls, Mary Muthoni, who alse lives at the base, came to ask our Team to help with first aid. When Anthony arrived there, he found Njeri in bad condition, so he got her to the hospital, after getting the young man into jail. When Anthony saw all the blood on her and was told by the doctor that she had internal bleeding, needed surgery, and might not survive, he felt a spasm in his body. He has some chest problems which may be asthma also, and the spasms made that worse.
When Anthony came to Sunday morning Bible class that I am teaching on 2 Peter this term (the Eastleigh Team comes to Kamulu for Saturday night and Sunday morning), I saw him spasm in class. It appeared to me that he has 3 spasms – his left arm, the left side of his body and his whole upper body. It is just a momentary jerk. He also feels great responsibility; a local policeman told him he was responsible if anything bad happened at the nighttime fund-raisers. At any rate, we decided it was time to take “burnout action.”
My first action was to talk briefly with Anthony. I asked him to describe what he was feeling in his body. Then I instructed him to take care of himself as well as all the other people. When he told me that they were raising about 500 shillings each night in the fund-raisers, I told him to ask them NOT to meet Sunday night, and in turn I would give them 1,000 shillings. That allows Anthony to get a full night’s sleep. Then Francis Mbuvi instructed Anthony to come back to Kamulu on Monday and spend two nights with us, giving Mbuvi time to debrief Anthony and listen to him talk about his feelings and the bad stuff he has seen lately. Kennedy will handle the fund-raisers Monday and Tuesday. Then Kennedy will come out for two nights and spend time with Mbuvi. I also asked Anthony about the t-shirt that he was wearing under his outer shirt; I told him I could tell that it has a big red “S” on it. He looked at me quizzically until I told him about Superman, then he laughed and admitted her felt responsible for everything.
Our next step was to give him opportunity to do something truly good. On Monday he plans to get Njeri from the hospital, take her to the police station to write a statement, then see her back to Jamaica Base. So I gave him 1,000 shillings and asked him to find her a room down in Mathare Valley that he can rent for about 700 shillings a month, then to buy her and her two children food with the rest. He will pay two months’ rent and encourage her and her 16-year-old to earn money in the next two months and be able to pay the rent after that. Whether that happens or she returns to Jamaica Base, we will have done something good for Anthony. Tomorrow when we go to Eastleigh for the Monday program, we will take two mattresses and two blankets for the family’s bedding.
I also alerted Larry Conway to the situation so that he can find some quiet time soon to sit with Anthony and be a listener.
I’ll let you know later what happens to the spasms.
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