Feeling Good and Bad

These days I mostly feel good.  We know that what we are doing is something that God wants done, for He himself visits the garbage dump to find the needy and lift them up and seat them among the great ones of his people (Psalm 113).  And we have such good kids; we have never known a teen group that thrills us like this one does.  This morning I taught my adult Bible class (to whom several of the teenagers come) at Kamulu -- actually I let a film do the teaching called "Peter and Paul".  Darlene and I left before 10 AM with 4 of our kids -- Ken Wabungu, Francis Wahome, Mercy Wanja and Jackie Njoki -- to visit the Kayole Church of Christ.  They invited the kids to sing two songs and me to preach.  It was a great visit. 

But I seem to always have something to feel bad about. And there were two things today.  Just before they served the Lord's Supper, the worship leader mentioned the Supper and the collection, and I thought, "Oh, no, I have no money."  I hate it when I don't have anything to give, so I had to apologize to the church and promise to get it to them later.  

Then I gave myself something else to feel bad about.  I had prepared a sermon on the book of Hosea, and I wanted to present it not as an analysis but as the book itself is written.  And I wanted to make some practical application.  I forgot that I would need to have a translator -- I didn't trust myself to do the Swahili on some of the passages.  But translating means that it takes longer -- so I ended up preaching for 45 minutes, which is also something to make me feel bad.  I didn't apologize for that, except to the 4 kids and Darlene on the way home.  

This is the nature of life -- that we live in the midst of the good and the bad.  It is, I suppose, a product of Eden, of eating the fruit that is forbidden to the pure in heart.  So our hearts, or at least mine, can never be fully clean and pure, without blemish.  

It makes Romans 7 a really important word for life.  "Who can save me from this dilemma, where I want to do good but find myself doing bad?"  And the answer lies in Jesus!  So the slogan some people laughter at (what is the question? ha-ha) really has truth in it:  Jesus is the Answer! 

By the way, I think our kids are starting to think that Darlene is strange.   Of course, lots of our "mzungu" (foreigner) ways are strange to them.  Today we had the two girls come to our house for lunch since we were late (after the preacher talked too long) and the girls did not save them any food.  We sat down to make sandwiches, then we found out that neither of them had ever eaten a sandwich!  I showed them what I do -- I put mustard and Miracle Whip on bread, then got a slice of ham, onions, tomatoes, lettuce, put it all together and cut it.  They were looking at my work strangely, so Darlene said to them, "Would you like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich," to which they both quickly said, "Yes."  I think they thought the meat was raw, and they never eat raw veggies, unless it's a carrot.  Anyway, they enjoyed the peanut butter, and the orange soda, and each took an apple and went off to their Sunday afternoon Bible class.

  But the reason they think Darlene is strange is that she goes around wearing a chameleon; she even carried one around while she was videotaping the wedding.  Abdi Isaac catches them and gives them to her, but most people think they are poisonous and are a lot like snakes!  Here is is with her little pet, which she set free in the back yard, and it disappeared.